Didi Darling, I Understand
Some days ago, we were treated to great hopes that a certain
saffron party might be lapping up votes in the North East of the country but
Didi declared through her noble spokesperson that she didn’t really care. The C.M.
OF Bengal wasn’t bothered. Not a bit. Not a mite. Scared? Who she? Didi and her
goons---er, sorry, I mean team were aiming for Lal Quila, that is Delhi, that
is the Prime Minister’s slot. Wow! We were impressed. We puffed and preened. We
wagged our tails.
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| Ipsita Roy Chakraverti |
Then Did set sail for Delhi to round up the would-be army of
allies, the poor foot soldiers who would love to be on the winning side but
didn’t have a leader to blaze the way. Didi, huffing and puffing, raised the
flag of a prospective front which would overcome and squash the present
government at the Centre. We all held our breaths. Was Didi doing all this to
divert our attention from the anti-incumbency turmoil that her own state
government in Bengal is facing?
Be that as it may there was more hi-jinks to
come. Didi in Delhi, holed up with family, that is Abhishek at South Avenue and
called the would-be ministers and netas to come and see her. She proposed to
talk about how they could best oust the nasties at the Centre. First, if I am
not mistaken, came poor Arvind Kejriwal, with a colleague. I think it’s so cute
that Arvind and Mamata are called ‘ Babli and Bunty’ . Anyhow, Didi welcomed
them and before launching forth into a flurry of plans for the future she insisted
they have fried, vegetable pakodas! Each one eight pakodas. No more. No less.
The magic number? Had her tantric in Kolkata told her that each participant
would be under her spell if she could stuff these down their gullets? But wait.
Bunty was wise. He refused. Excused himself by saying that he had a health
issue which prevented him from partaking of such food. He told his sweating
colleague to do the honours. Poor chap. Didi was disappointed but something is
better than nothing. The AAP chap had to gobble the pakodas down.
When Congress leader Ghulam Nabi Azad heard of the goings on
at Abhishek’s he hastily said that all ‘charcha’ would be over ‘chai’---not pakodas.
Meanwhile, Didi met a few more disgruntled politicians who
had not received much from the present regime. The motley crowd planning to
take over Lal Quila was not quite what she had expected but she kept her chin
up. Brave Didi. Now, she wanted to meet the Congress glamour girl Sonia who had
made it a point to keep away from her. So had Rahul. But Didi was determined.
She fixed up a sort of short meet with Sonia and that is all we know of Didi’s famous
march to Delhi to rouse and raise a third front.
Net result? Now we hear the most fantastic and hilarious new
that after Didi’s onslaught Chandrababu Naidu is doing a round of prospective allies,
Sonia Gandhi says she is willing to be PM and even our poor, old, well into
years former President, Pranab Mukherjee, is shuffling through the Constitution
wondering if a former President can become a future Prime Minister.
What has Didi done?! And all the while she had been trying
to make it quite, quite clear that she was The One. Why are people so dense?
